Sugarlaws: Living Sweetly.

Entries Tagged as 'baby'

to each their own

October 6th, 2014 · 3 Comments

Family-Portrait-Cropped

It’s happened ever since we were first dating: when Chad and I go somewhere, sometimes if you look at our outfits, it looks like we are headed to two completely separate events.  I’ll be in a sequin cocktail dress and he’ll be in a polo shirt; he’ll be in a suit and I’ll be in leggings; you get the drill.  I should dig up some old photos — sometimes it’s actually pretty funny.

But this weekend, we took it to a new level.

This photo was taken at 10:45 a.m. on a Saturday morning.  We were heading to the one-year-old birthday party for one of Bear’s friends.

As you can see, we all had slightly different ideas of what would be appropriate to wear. 

Chad?  Basically dressed for work.

Me?  A child’s birthday party called for hot pink jeans, gold lame wedges (I kid you not; they’re just not in the frame), and a smokey eye.  Yup.  I went there.

And our son?

Our son is wearing a superman costume.

I love this photo.  I begged Chad to pause for a second as we headed out the door, just do document our outfit choices.  They were that amazing.

This family, man.  You can’t take us anywhere.

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Caroline-Bday-SL-1

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Tags: baby · life

band-aids that make mom proud

September 29th, 2014 · 9 Comments

Vaccine-Final-1

Do you see that band-aid?

It’s not often that a mom is excited to see a band-aid on her baby.  In fact, I’d venture to say that it’s exactly *never* that a mom greets a sight like this with a smile.

With one exception.

When those band-aids are there after your baby’s four-month vaccines.

See, here’s the thing.  If you look at Facebook or sometimes even the news, you might think that there’s actually some medical controversy over whether or not you should vaccinate your kids.

AND YOU WOULD BE WRONG.

Let’s be clear: Vaccines save lives.  We are very, very lucky to be living in a country and at a time when vaccines against deadly diseases are safe, effective and readily available.  Children all over the world do not have that luxury. 

And yet, parents — a terrifying number of parents — choose not to offer their children this life-saving protection, because of misguided fears that ignore science in lieu of groundless speculation.  The article that originally claimed to link vaccines and autism has now been universally discredited and withdrawn by the journal that published it.  No medical data has ever supported any link between vaccines and autism. 

And yet somehow this unfounded “controversy” lingers.  And it is putting kids at risk.

As parenting goes, you will almost never hear a whiff of judgment from me.  Breastfeed or bottle-feed?  Both are great.  Stay home or keep working?  Up to you, mama.  Daycare or a nanny?  Either one!  Night-wake till they’re two?  More power to you.  Cry it out?  You gotta do what you gotta do.

Not one of those decisions is life-or-death for your baby.  They are all choices that can be made in different ways by reasonable, caring parents.

Vaccinating your child?

That is different. 

That is life or death – and not just for your child, but for every other child they interact with.

That is a life or death decision you are making for my child.

See, vaccines aren’t 100% effective.  They require multiple rounds before a child reaches immunity, and individual kids may have different immune responses in a particular case, even if the vaccine itself is effective 99% of the time.  The reason we don’t see these illnesses anymore, even though the vaccines aren’t perfect, is because of herd immunity — because all kids get the vaccines, even if your kid isn’t perfectly immune, it’s very unlikely for him or her to be exposed to the actual disease.

But when parents stop vaccinating their kids?  Their kids are at risk, obviously.  But so is every single other child, whether it’s a newborn who hasn’t had any shots or a five-year-old with a severe allergic reaction that prevented his own vaccination.

Deciding not to vaccinate your children is not just stupid.  Sure, it’s stupid. 

But it’s also profoundly selfish. 

Those kids are depending on you.  My kid is depending on you.

So, please.  Please.  Please.  Inform yourselves.  Learn the science.  There is not, and has never been, any scientific evidence of a causal relationship between vaccines and autismVaccines save lives every single day, and as a parent, I am thrilled and grateful to be able to provide them for my child.

So those band-aids?

Yes, they make me smile. 

Tags: baby

baby bear: four months

September 17th, 2014 · 4 Comments

Baby Bear,

I say this every month, but I think we are finally getting life under control!

See, here’s the thing. You take your sweet new baby home from the hospital, and for a few weeks, insanity ensues. You don’t have enough time to shower, brush your teeth, or check your email before it’s time for another diaper change, feeding, nap attempt, cuddle, whatever. Around the clock. Without a break.

And then a few weeks go by and it gets a little easier, and you think, “ok, we’re in the clear. From now on, things are going to be smooth sailing.”

But the real truth is: life with a baby doesn’t exactly get easier each month… it just get different.

Sure, some things get easier. When a four month old cries, you have a general sense of what the issue may be, and you know how to solve 90% of the possible problems.  And by now, I feel like I have a basic idea of how to take care of a baby, something that I just did not have when you were born.

(True story: when they put you on my chest, the first thing I said was, “I don’t know what I’m doing.”  I kid you not.  Those were the first words you heard your mom say. I had never held a newborn before, and you were so tiny that I was terrified that I might somehow hurt you.)

But now, you’re a little bigger and a little sturdier, and not quite so terrifyingly delicate — which puts my mind at ease, at least a tiny bit.  So, lots of things do get easier as the months go by.

But… other things get harder.

Like, say, sleep.

Here’s what no one tells you: It is completely possible for a four-month-old baby to sleep worse than a newborn.  Remember my little two-week-old baby who slept for four or six hours at a time?  Well, that baby turned into a three-and-a-half-month old who slept for no more than ninety minutes at once, ever, for weeks on end.  It.  Was.  Brutal.

But even in my extensively sleep-deprived state, watching you grow has been so much fun, and this month brought so many amazing new moments.

And, here, I’ll say it.

You are just SO darn cool.

Whether it’s learning to roll over or learning to laugh (!), it seems like every day brings some new skill. And it’s amazing to watch you discover each of these tiny little actions that remind us: you are slowly growing into your own little person, with all your own likes and dislikes and joys and sorrows. That’s the most incredible thing to watch, really — to see this little person emerge from an unformed newborn into something that’s starting to resemble a child.

And that’s what I’m most excited about, as the months go on — watching you become yourself, learning your place in the world, and seeing the person you become.

I said this while I was pregnant, and I feel it even more now: creating a life was a wonderful thing, and the experience of pregnancy was something I will cherish forever. But parenting is a million times more rewarding, more exciting, and more fulfilling than the biological process of pregnancy. Whether you had joined our family through birth, through adoption, or some other way, your entrance into our lives is an incredibly opportunity.  It’s the opportunity to guide a new person into becoming a happy, healthy, kind, and compassionate human being.

I think about that goal all the time, and I hope, as you develop more and more every day, that I’m doing a good job.

With so much love, and more every single day,

Your mom.

Tags: baby · life