tic tac toe

February 15th, 2018 · No Comments

When you decide to play Tic Tac Toe, but your cute kid won’t play unless you’re both on the same time. 

Team O for the win!

Tags: baby

making it look easy?  i hope not.

March 14th, 2016 · 29 Comments

Bear-Mom-Final-1

Hi guys!  I’m currently in the process of redesigning this website, so I thought I’d revisit a few older posts that I’m really proud of.  If you didn’t catch these the first time, please check them out!  More updates soon.  xo

Sometimes when I post a particularly sweet photo, video, or blog post about our son, I get a comment back: “You make it look easy.”

Undoubtedly, this comment comes from a good place.  It’s someone telling me that I’m doing ok at this whole mothering thing (hopefully, I am), that life seems pretty good (it is) and that the baby and I are clearly happy (we are). 

But, oh my gosh.  The last thing I would want to do ever is make it look easy.

Social media and blogging are such wonderful additions to our culture; they let people connect across huge distances and cultural divides.  They make cooped-up new moms feel like they’re part of a community, they help us share knowledge and advice, and they enrich our lives in so many ways.

But they also make us competitive with each other.  They make us compare our real-life experience with a snapshot of someone else’s — a beautiful, happy snapshot, but one that lacks context and background.  Trust me: For every cute date-night outfit, there’s also a day when I don’t have time to even brush my hair.  For every sweet baby smile, there’s a night when he wakes up every two hours in tears.  Those moments are part of reality for any new mom, whether we choose to share them or not. 

Bear-Final-2

I don’t mean to say that there’s anything wrong with posting those beautiful moments — there isn’t, and I treasure all the sweet little smiles I’ve captured on camera in these last few months. 

But phrases like “making it look easy” make it seem like there’s something wrong with you if it’s not easy.  If it’s not easy, that it’s your fault.  That it could be “easy” if you would just do things differently. 

But here’s the thing: life isn’t rewarding or rich because it’s easy.  Life is incredible because of those tiny little moments, every day, when we appreciate something joyful or meaningful in our daily experiences.  Sure, there are great, easy days.  And there are also so many great moments in the not-easy days. 

If you’re expecting it to be easy — just because someone else might make it look easy — you’re always going to be unsatisfied. 

And I wanted to write this, because I worry sometimes that I contribute to it.  I worry that when I write about topics like breastfeeding, postpartum weight loss, or even how I’ve chosen to pursue my career, that others will feel badly because they’re struggling with those same issues.  To write about these topics suggests, in some small way, that you have figured them out.  But these are day-to-day struggles, and I don’t think anyone has fully figured them out.

All our lives are different.  And it’s important to remember that.  Each mom out there — each person out there, parent or not — has their own ups and downs that are unique to their family.  And I know that some of my toughest moments — the 2 a.m. wake-ups and the mornings that I frantically proofread a brief while our son naps in the next room — are the memories that I’ll look back on, years later, when he’s all grown up, and smile. 

So who really wants ‘easy’ anyways?

Tags: baby · life

happy (almost) halloween!

October 22nd, 2015 · 6 Comments

sugarlaws-37

I love holidays — pretty much any holiday. 

This comes as a surprise to exactly no one, because my favorite things in the world are parties, great food, and spending time with friends and family.  So holidays?  On the list of things that I love, they fall somewhere between Bear and Buffy the Vampire Slayer, which is to say: very high on that list.

But there’s a special spot in my heart for Halloween.  When I was a kid, I really believed that there was something magical about the night of Halloween.  I’d pretend to go to bed and then stay up in my room, in the dark, until it was finally midnight, waiting for ghosts or trying my hand at magic spells. 

Bear was too little to go trick-or-treating last year, but we might give it a try next week!  Either way, I couldn’t let the moment go by without some snaps of his Halloween costume.  Last year, he was a baby dinosaur, and this year he’s a panda bear!  I know that pretty soon he’ll be telling me what he wants to be for Halloween, so I’m enjoying my last chance to pick out his costume myself. 

And, if I do say so: that is one cute Panda!

Photo credit: Rachel Sutherland

sugarlaws-28

sugarlaws-29

sugarlaws-31

sugarlaws-33

sugarlaws-36

sugarlaws-40

Tags: baby