A friend recently told me a saying, that I’m feeling acutely this week:
There are two halves of pregnancy. The first eight months, and the last four weeks.
I so very excited to meet this little baby, but also really physically uncomfortable as the weeks go by. He’s getting so big now, and sometimes when he spends an hour pushing my internal organs out of place… ouch.
On the other hand, though, I’m grateful that we have these last few weeks to get everything ready! I’m starting to feel like everything is more or less in place, although it seems like every day I remember some new item for the to-do list.
And then there are things that have been on the to-do list forever, and yet I’ve made no progress. For instance: Making a Birth Plan.
I know, I know. I need to get it. But somehow every time I start to think it, I just get totally overwhelmed.
See, there are SO MANY OPTIONS. In my head, pretty much my only expectation is to get the baby out safely. But when I sit down to come up with a birth plan, all the examples I find are, like, ten pages long and include a whole bunch of stuff that I’ve never even thought about. Like, what kind of fetal monitoring do I want? (It’s not just ‘some’ or ‘none,’ it’s a bunch of different types, which all need to be extensively researched, obviously.) Do I want membrane stripping? Pitocin? Prostaglandin gel?
Every time I try to tackle it, I spend fifteen panic-stricken minutes googling what all these things are… and then promptly give up. And put the birth plan off for another day.
Except… now we are getting to the point where I could potentially go into labor this week, and still… no birth plan.
Am I being terrible? Sometimes I worry that putting these things off is somehow a sign that I’m not ready to be a parent — like, a good mom would have researched membrane stripping by now. I know that’s crazy, and that I’m going to be just as good a mom as the girl with the 20-page-single-spaced birth plan.
But on the other hand, I don’t want to put it off so long that I’m frantically googling “what is prostaglandin gel” while there is a baby trying to make its way out of my body.
On the other hand… I’m pretty sure that people gave birth for thousands of years without elaborate birth plans. And when I hear stories about labor from friend or family, the most common thread seems to be, “nothing went the way I expected it to.”
So I’m trying to be flexible about the whole thing. I know that I’ve done enough research to have a rough idea of what I want and don’t want, and I have a LOT of trust my doctor and our hospital. My type-A personality feels guilty about not checking off all the boxes, but with this one — does it really matter?
I’d love advice on this — did you do a birth plan? Did you feel like it really helped?
How far along? 33 Weeks
Total weight gain/loss: 22 pounds
Maternity clothes? Still just pants really!
Stretch marks? Still no! I’m still using Earth Mama Angel Baby stretch mark oil about 3 times a week, and so far it seems to have worked!
Symptoms: All the symptoms. My body is just generally pretty uncomfortable these days.
Sleep: Off and on. I’m still waking up multiple times every night, but this week I’d say was generally better, sleep-wise.
Best moment this week: This is a fun and not baby-related one — Marie Claire came to Houston to do a street-style feature, and I got to shoot with them on Saturday morning! I’ll do a post on my outfit soon, but it was a blast!
Worst moment of the week: There wasn’t one that I can think of.
Have you told family and friends: Yes!
Miss Anything? My balance!
Food cravings: Mangoes, blackberries, Twizzlers, oreo cookie dough.
Anything making you queasy or sick: Nope!
Have you started to show yet: I am huge!
Labor Signs: I get worried about various pains and cramps, but so far they’ve all passed.
Belly Button in or out? In!
Wedding rings on or off? On
Happy or Moody most of the time: Happy!
Looking forward to: Finishing everything up and moving on to this next stage of our lives!