Baby Bump: 35 Weeks!

April 2nd, 2014


It’s funny — at the beginning of this pregnancy, I spent most of my time worrying about all the little items on my to-do list for before the baby arrived.  (My biggest panic-inducing moment revolved around a ceiling fan, so it couldn’t have been that bad.) But somehow, the thought about what we’d do after the baby arrived didn’t really flicker onto my radar.

But this trimester: It’s like someone just told me that we are going to have a baby, and not only am I completely unprepared, but this little guy is going to arrive in, like, approximately four minutes. 

I keep asking our friends with newborns, “they tell you a lot at the hospital, right?  About how to take care of a baby?”

And they kind of look at me like, awww, it’s cute that you think that

Because, from what I gather: nobody tells you anything.

For a little creature whose life seems to revolve around three or four basic needs, it’s astounding that the first few weeks of parenthood seem to be characterized by complete panic in every single person I talk to.

And in the last few weeks it finally hit me that probably… mine will be too. 

Because no matter how many books or websites I read or friends I email with a zillion questions, there will come a moment at 4 a.m. in my immediate future where this sweet little baby is crying inconsolably and I have no idea how to make him stop. 

And here’s my hope, for that moment, which I can see coming a mile away and still do nothing to prevent:

I hope that in that moment, as awful as it feels, I can remember that this is normal.  That it doesn’t mean I’m failing as a mom or doing a terrible job.  That every terrific mom I know has been in this exact same situation — my own terrific mom included — and that no matter how hard they’ve tried, there will still be moments like this. 

And I hope that thought will give me a little bit of comfort, and reassure me that trying my best is enough, even when it feels like it’s not. 

It’s advice that I give to others all the time, but it’s so hard to apply to yourself.  Sure, I can tell a friend that her mistake is no big deal, that her child is well-loved and cared for, but when I make that same mistake?

No cutting any slack, I’m going straight to Worst Mom Ever.

I put a lot of pressure on myself — we all do.  But the worst time to be draconian with that pressure is when you’re entering a new, terrifying adventure for which everyone feels completely unprepared, and everyone makes mistakes as they go. 

So, six or seven weeks from now, at 4 o’clock in the morning, I hope to be able to look back on this post, and give myself the advice that I would so freely give to anyone else.

You are doing your best.  And you are probably doing just fine.


How far along? 35 Weeks (I’m two weeks behind in these posts, so I’m actually 37 weeks as I write this!)

Total weight gain/loss: 23 pounds

Maternity clothes? Pants exclusively.  Still working in my non-maternity tops and sweaters.

Stretch marks? Still no!  Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night and use a double does of belly oil if I’m feeling itchy.  Fingers crossed!

Symptoms: This is new: I can’t sit still for more than 45 minutes or so without being tremendously uncomfortable.  I’ve started getting up for frequent breaks throughout the day, and generally trying to walk around as much as I can, and it seems to be helping.

Sleep: Not great, in that I get up a bunch of times during the night.  That being said, my insomnia has really been in major remission since I’ve been pregnant, which is wonderful.  I’m wondering if it will continue after the baby arrives…

Best moment this week: Finishing the nursery! 

Worst moment of the week: I think in some ways the waiting is the worst part — knowing that there’s this impending change on the horizon and just sitting here waiting for it to hit.

Have you told family and friends: Yes!

Miss Anything? Being comfortable!

Movement: Less as the weeks go on, but still some.

Food cravings: Cupcakes, raspberries, cheese.  Roughly in that order.

Anything making you queasy or sick: UGH.  I skipped breakfast one morning this week and promptly dry-heaved into our sink.  I haven’t felt this queasy since week 6!

Have you started to show yet: Definitely.

Labor Signs: I wonder constantly if every pain is a contraction…

Belly Button in or out? Mostly in — it’s a little deformed at this point!

Wedding rings on or off? On

Happy or Moody most of the time: Mostly happy!

Looking forward to: The wait being over!

Tags: baby

8 responses so far ↓

  • 1 Stacy Dill // Apr 2, 2014 at 10:39 am

    Love your dress! Perfect for post pregnancy as well! As far as insomnia goes- the cure should continue- new babies have a way of helping with that. First week or so you might be too excited/worried to sleep so just go with it. Try to relax. Remember you can have a glass of wine or a nice cup of tea. Just try to have relaxation moments even if you can’t sleep. As far as the baby goes- he is unique! He is YOUR baby! You will know what to do! Go with what your gut tells you! Call that doctor! Call your mom! Limit visitors or not. Some babies are easy-going; others are NOT. Trial and error. Going with the gut. Starts with a newborn; continues throughout parenthood. The circumstances change but the approach does not. You’ve got this. You and your husband and family!

  • 2 Katherine // Apr 2, 2014 at 11:14 am

    So exciting! You’re in those final stages when you start to buy food from the grocery store that has expiration dates PAST your due date!

    Have you taken a parenting class? We took a one-day, 3 hr one that covered a lot of the basics and was very helpful to us. You still have time if you haven’t taken one. Your hospital might offer one. They covered things like swaddling, swaying, shushing, etc.

    The class I regret not taking was breastfeeding. However, that is something they help you with at the hospital. Just ask for help immediately and often, even if you did read up on it and take a class on it. The nurses can help and they’ll also have a lactation consultant around. One thing I did better the second time was just to ask for more help while in the hospital, even though I supposedly knew what I was doing at that point.

    The rest of my advice at this time is to be patient. Be ready (get your hospital bag packed), but then just assume he’s definitely coming late, and that way you won’t be too antsy in the final weeks. I had the right attitude the first time around and even bought concert tickets for my due date, so it was great when Alexander came early (other than the concert thing, and the fact that the bag was NOT yet packed). However, I wrongly thought history would repeat itself, so I was a wreck when Athena was 4 days late.

    And yes, please refer back to this post! You are going to do an AMAZING job as a mom, so when times are tough, just remember you’re doing well!

  • 3 el minooche // Apr 3, 2014 at 4:15 pm

    So exciting! Congrats!!!

    We love your style posts! I’m the social media manager from El Minooche, a fun handbag and accessory company ready to make it’s debut in the US in May ’14. We’re looking for a great brand ambassador for our upcoming launch. (We’re totally re-doing our website so no judgements please haha!) Let me know if you’re interested!

  • 4 Samantha // Apr 4, 2014 at 9:11 am

    I just had a baby girl 3 months ago- my first baby. I felt the exact same way as you did. Here is the best advice I can give you:
    1. Not sure if you plan on breastfeeding. I did before I had her but missed the breastfeeding class and freaked out that I wouldn’t know what to do. I PROMISE YOU, its self explanatory.
    2. NO MATTER how OVERWHELMED you will feel the first few weeks (and you will and you won’t understand the extent of it now until he comes out and you go back home), take in every minute of the newborn stage because it goes by so quickly.
    3. When you see your little guy for the first time you will be so in love and want to hold him and not let go. Whatever you do, make sure he sleeps in the nursery during the night at the hospital. You need your rest for the coming weeks.
    4. If you plan on getting the epidural/spinal, I know it seems like the scariest thing now, it literally doesnt hurt when they put it in they numb you first and you will barely feel it. If you wait too long to get it and your contractions are very close together it will suck. Get it as soon as possible. If you need to get induced (especially since this is your first, its pretty common) I suggest getting the epidural before you even feel a contraction. It will literally make labor so much less stressful.
    5. If you’re the 1 in 5th person who needs a C section, it is NOT the worst thing in the world. I had one. I was walking and getting up the next day and recovered beautifully. I did not take a single painkiller. The reason: I stood up as soon as I was allowed to and took lots of walking laps in the hallway of the hospital. It really helps!

    GOOD LUCK! Can’t wait to see pictures of your little man!

  • 5 Rose // Apr 17, 2014 at 6:23 pm

    One of the best maternity dresses I’ve seen! Where is it from?

  • 6 katy // Apr 18, 2014 at 10:38 am

    Rose — You’re going to laugh, but it’s actually a maternity bathing suit coverup!  I hated maternity clothes, but fell in love with it. 🙂 It’s here:

  • 7 Rose // Apr 18, 2014 at 11:16 am

    Haha, thanks! I only started to find cute maternity clothes AFTER I had the baby. A tiny part of me wishes I were pregnant again just so I can wear pretty bump-wear again 🙂

  • 8 brustverkleinerung // Sep 25, 2014 at 8:10 pm

    Genuinely when someone doesn’t know afterward its up to other people that they will assist, so here it takes

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